Mindful Mommy Monday | R-E-S-P-E-C-T Find out what it means to .. your children

Happy Monday mindful parents!!!

This weeks topic is on RESPECT (ya'll know I sing every time I spell it right? Lol). Respect for our children, our spouses, and OURSELVES.  Honestly, respect for the others fall into place when we establish a healthy since of respect for ourselves - but we'll get into that.

Now, blog topics always come to existence from what the Hoot Family is experiencing at home.  And lately we've been getting "I'm not your friend mommy!"  And he's gotten into either screaming it or mumbling it under his breath.  Either way, my response is still the same, "I am not here to be your friend!  I am here to be your mother and you will do what you are supposed to do!"  As parents, some times, we battle with how to get our children to trust us and do what we ask.  And too often it comes down to "We're friends.  You do what I need and I'll do what you need" rather than "I told you to clean up the trash, so you will clean up the trash."  Children protest and moan and groan because it's what they do.  They don't feel like doing whatever it is, they don't want to stop doing what they're doing, they think they know everything, etc etc.  Whatever your child's reason for dragging their feet and nagging about a particular rule is not unique to the "parenting game." Lol.  But too often we feel like "I don't want to be too stern" or "I don't want to seem like a bully."  There is a healthy difference between blatantly bullying and belittling your child and commanding respect.  The trick - finding the balance.  Your children will have lots of friends come and go from their lives.  But they will only have you as parents.  Make sure your children and you know the difference.

This article does an amazing job on hashing out a "friendship" with your child & respect.  Parenting: Respect Starts At Home 

How do we make sure we're getting what we need as parents and giving our children what they need as blossoming adults?  The first goal set clear expectations and boundaries (our book is focused on this!) for your children (and the people around you).  Be a sure and confident parent.  Know that you are sticking to your guns in all aspects of your life.  Remember - your children are watching.  Do not be persuaded by the their crying, temper tantrums, and pleas.  However, it is healthy to be flexible & kind.  Have conversations with your children about earning trust and respect.  But, if they do things against what you have made clear - give consequences that teach them about breaking trust and damaging respect.  Being kind, empathetic  and steadfast will show them that you respect them.  Side Bar: I love the examples they use in our book, with the family going to Disney Land and the family going grocery shopping!  It's very easy to relate to  and apply.

Resources: 
Parenting with Respect and Peacefulness
Good Parenting Starts with Respect for Kids

One of the sentences that I keep saying from the book, " boundaries are typically caught before they are taught ..." HOW TRUE IS THIS!?  It's easy for us to think that the only time we are raising a child is when we're in MOMMY MODE.  Any time your child is in ear shot or eye shot of you they are receiving information on how to behave in the world and what is/is not acceptable.  Think about that!!!  Parenting with respect means that you are holding your self responsible and accountable for helping your child to develop into a well rounded individual.  How does this feel, "Your child is reacting to your parenting."  O_O NO! Lol. Say it ain't so.  Think about it, you have a mouthy, rude, bull headed little 6 yr old.  O_O NO!!!! Lol.  Chances are you're a mouthy, bull headed, no hold bared kind of adult & parent.  Remember, there is no way you can raise a happier child without being a happier person.  Well behaved children have well behaved parents.. PERIOD.

I realize this post is a little rambly, I am so PASSIONATE about respect and responsibility.  Once you determine what kind of things you will and will not accept it becomes easier to demand respect of those around you and for you to maintain proper respect for them.  I encourage ALL of my loved ones to never accept less than you deserve and never expect more than you require.  Be responsible for how you treat people and for how you allow people to treat you.  Taking responsibility for how your actions affect those around you (EVEN YOUR CHILDREN) is a sign of maturity and growth.  As a mother of a daughter - how you behave inside of your marriage or basic relationship with her father will let her know how a woman should act with a man.  You are teaching her how a man should behave when he loves her.  Do not allow your daughter to see you giving control of your happiness and health to a partner that does not support and admire you.  Allow her to see a woman that is rooted in faith (not a religious faith per se), love, and truthfulness - a true partnership and friendship.  We have to be the kind of adults we want to raise them to become.  Mommies of boys, through our relationships we teach them how a woman in love should behave. We are the first women that they learn how to express love towards and then show him how love should be expressed in return.  But without taking a hard look at the relationships in our lives, how we behave in them, how we allow people to treat us, etc etc - growth is a hard road to travel.

I hope everyone was able to keep up!

Video review on the book coming soon! <3


The challenge!  We will not be moved!  :-) Yes, Mama Hoot has missed a couple of postings.  But I will not be swayed from progress.  We are trekking into week 8 - PASSION!  What does your little one have a passion for and how can you get involved.  (Is it just me or does this sound repetitive. But parenting is about persistence and steadfastness. Lol.) Do your kids see you working your passion!!?  What are some things you are passionate about?  Make sure to set time, and teach your child about setting time, aside to work on the things you are passionate about! 1 .. 2 .. 3 .. GO!

See you on YouTube! <3

As always - I love you mommies!

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About Mindful Mommy Monday Blogger

Dominique is an owner of In Focus Business Solutions, LLC and Jane Doe, LLC, a mother of two, wife, and student.  She is an mixed media artists and experienced Customer Service Trainer.  She pushes awareness and mindfulness to the forefront of her work.  Her community work is done with mommies and assisting people re-entering the work force.  

To contact Dominique email her at: dominiquepap@gmail.com