Mindful Mommy Monday | 1 Year... Round 2

Cheerful Monday parents!!  Remember how you greet the day will determine what you receive from the day. <3 

I have learned to say hello to Monday with a smile on my face, even if I'd like to kick it in the chins. Lol.  So no worries on Monday.  I accomplished exactly what I was supposed to accomplish today and ended up in all places I was needed at the perfect time!

Now that I've gotten that out of the way.  I get to share!  Saturday was Hoot 2's 1st birthday!  My mother and brother came for the weekend and we had a fabulous, slightly chilly, pool party.  Lol.  I am so grateful to everyone that came by and shared in our excitement.  We also were able to celebrate the pending arrival of my God son RJ (just thinking about him makes me so excited)!!

So what does round 2 of year 1 look like?  Sleepless nights.  Breastfeeding weaning (happy Breastfeeding week by the way).  Walking 2 days before 12 months old.  Lots of cuddles.  Super huge smiles.  Stay at home woes.  Falling in love again.  Friends.  Family.  GREAT MEMORIES!

As the days and months pass I have to constantly remind myself that Hoot 1 & 2 are different boys.  They developed differently, their personalities are different, I had different pregnancies, and all around different parenting experiences.  It's been beautiful, trying, and awakening.  I'm so very excited to watch them grow together and learn more and more about them.

Daddy Hoot and I can tell that Hoot 2 is a sports kid and Hoot 1 is an arts kid.  Lol.  Hoot 1 does not really care to watch football or basketball but will draw and write stories for hours.  Hoot 2 won't build with blocks or shapes at all, he'd rather play with cars & motorcycles.  While Hoot 1 still likes to build with his big blocks and even tries to mix his designs with his Legos.  They both fill me with so much joy!  With all of the milestones we've hiked up together, 

I'm happy to say Year 1 .. round 2 .. NAILED IT!   

Since it's Breastfeeding Week I want to share one of the more stressful milestones!  Weaning!  Now, I FULLY support breastfeeding past infancy.  I genuinely believe it helps mommy and baby emotionally and physically.  The closeness you develop with breastfeeding cannot be mimicked by any brand of formula!  So breastfeed with pride and power mommies.  However, if and when you breastfeed - listen to your body, baby, and know what you're comfortable with.  I decided to wean Hoot 2 at 1 year because I felt it was best for both of us.  I had a lot of anxiety about giving him a bottle, let alone formula.



With Hoot 2 my breastfeeding barely made it 3 months.  I went back to work insanely early and got home super late (past 8 PM some nights).  After having an easy peasy bottle all day, Hoot 1 wasn't digging the boob.  It devastated me.  Coupling that with postpartum depression and I was just a mess.  So with Hoot 2 I was determined to breastfeed.  I knew I wanted to and I knew I would AT LEAST make it 1 year.  Well, I did it!  And I'm actually looking forward to having control of my body back until I can talk Daddy Hoot into a little Hoot 3.  Lol.  I started the process at about 10 months by slowly adding the bottle to his routine and finally getting down to only night time nursing.  Around the middle of month 11 - we did away with that and he's been doing well.  He still likes to reach into my (and Daddy Hoot's) shirt, pull on bra straps, and rub but he takes his bottle and sippy cup well.  He's also started sleeping a full night!!! <3 <3 <3


While I made the decision to not breastfeed through toddler years and beyond, I fully support mommies that do!  I am floored with admiration and adoration for\your power and will.  You are beautifully amazing!!  To help you be an even more awesome you I'm going to share a few links that were passed to me by a mommy friend.  They are giving away breastfeeding supplies for FREE, all you have to do is pay shipping.  Hopefully they all work and you're able to get your freebies!

Resources:
Early Moments
Nursing Pillow - Use code BFWEEK13
Seven Slings - Use code BFWEEK13
Udder Covers - Use code BREASTFEEDING2013
Breastfeeding Insurance & Reimbursement 

Happy Breastfeeding Week Mommies!!!  Don't cover up in public.  Don't feel judged for nursing your toddler.  Unsnap your bra with bride!! <3 Kudos to you.  No one will ever understand the demand on you and the BOND you create when nursing.  

How was your week whipping your routine into shape?  The Hoot Family did pretty well and guess what... We made it to Hoot 2's birthday party at the time we said we would!!!  We even beat our friends who are using super early!!  How super fab is that?!  We had a game plan, we got up, we executed, we didn't take no stuff.  Lol.  And we made it.  The birthday went off without a hitch.  Sidenote: Thank you SO MUCH Chris and Satina for being as freakn FAB-TABULOUS as you are.  Overall, I'm pleased.  It showed me that we really are capable of being on time.  Lol.  We need a plan, be prepared, and get to it!  It's possible!

Live a FabuLESS Life Archive

This weeks challenge is Rewarding VS. Bribing.  There is a REAL difference here parents.  "If you behave in the store, I will buy you 1 snack you want." - BRIBING.  "Thank you for behaving in the store.  I know how hard it is sometimes to not touch things you may want.  Pick 1 treat for yourself." - REWARD.  A bribe usually comes from times of frustration.  They are screaming and you just really want to finish shopping.  Or you're desperately trying to get them to clean their room or do homework.  Check in with your motives and intent.  Your son earns money for good grades on his report card... bribe or incentive to work hard?  If the reward is not consistent in the situation - then chances are it's a bribe.  Do you always get your little one a snack from the store when they behave (without being told) or did you only offer it because they were screaming and having a fit?  This will let you know if you're bribing or rewarding.  This week, break the bribing habit.  Check in with yourself before you offer your child something.  Make sure this is a consistent reward for work they are doing and not just something you're offering in the moment.  What is your intent?  To teach them a lesson in life and hard work or get them quiet?  GOOD LUCK parents!  Join my community on FB or follow me on Twitter & Instagram @dPaPiYON.

I am grateful for your patience with the videos! <3 Until next week parents...

Love, peace, & sanity!

-Mama Hoot

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About Mindful Mommy Monday Blogger

Dominique is an owner of Jane Doe, LLC, a mother of two, wife, and student.  She is an experienced  Artist Manager, Event Planner, and Branding Consultant.  She pushes awareness and mindfulness to the forefront of her work.  Her community work is done with mommies and assisting people re-entering the work force.  

To contact Dominique email her at: dominiquepap@gmail.com

IG: @dPaPiYON | FB: Dominique PapillionHerr | Twitter: @dPaPiYON

www.dPaPiYON.com

Mindful Mommy Monday | Punch. Kick. SMACK!

Happy days parents!

You may be able to guess what I talk about this week... Punch.  Kick.  SMACK!

Let me start by saying that Hoot 2 is an absolute gem!  He's is so amazing to be around.  People rave about him constantly.  He is funny, full of laughter, super sweet with insanely huge dimples, and so loving.  Oh but beware, this baby has a dark side.  I know, you're going "NNNOOO!!!  Hoot 2 is a sweetie."  -___- BE-WARE of the tricky baby!  Hoot 2 is a hitter (and a bitter at times).  

I can't even count how many times we've been jolted out of our sleep by a heavy handed smack in the face, followed by intense laughter, as we scream grunt and groan.  Or a seemingly innocent play session can go violent as he draws his hand back to give you a good wack across the cheek.  What in the world!!! When they're infants and hands are just kinda flying willy nilly, it's one thing.  When he's a 1 yr old hitting then cracking up, we have a problem.

Now, regulating his hitting wouldn't be so hard if he didn't have a super hero, action figure wanna be, captain save the day as a big brother.  Hoot 1 thinks his baby brother popping him upside the head is hilarious.  He leans in for more, giggling just as hard as Hoot 2 when he gets a one two smack!  All of which is followed up by a "Hitting is not funny! CUT IT OUT!" .. Lol.  And they both look wide eyed O_O... probably thinking, "But it's fun!" 


I am grateful that my newly 1 year old is not hitting from anger, frustration, or any emotional distress.  He simply thinks it's funny.  When dealing with hitting it's crucial to look into WHY your child is hitting.  This will help you tackle the hurdle.  I've learned that 1 year old go through a hitting phase.  They don't have words to express frustration and their everyday life consists of trying to learn new things and interact in situations that aren't easy for them.  Lashing out and punishing them (or even hitting them back) for hitting only affirms the behavior they are showing you.

So, let's first accept this; you cannot change that your 1 year old may hit (if they already haven't) but you can have a game plan for when/if they do.  I found great starter tips here.  When your little gal/guy hits let do not laugh or scream.  Be calm and collected.  Let them know hitting is not nice then attend to the person hit.  Got it.  But what do you do when the person hit laughs (like in the case of my Hoot Boys).  I am going to have to have a chat with Hoot 1 about why we must not laugh when Hoot 2 hits and exactly what we are trying to teach him.  Hoot 1 is an amazing big brother and expresses great pride in his little guy.  So I anticipate he will be receptive to making sure his brother is learning the proper lessons for life, wish me luck!  

Resources: 
Help for Hitting 
Biting and Hitting: 16 Ways to Stop It

Another area of concern if your little one is hitting, hitting in other areas of the family.  The little guy seeing spankings, family members that are very physical (even if it's in laughter - this is a problem for us), and fighting on TV/videos/etc.  Personally, I am VERY physical.  When someone says something really funny I hit.  When Daddy Hoot and I are playing or talking slick to each other, I hit.  It's what I've always done.  Which has in turn, been exposed to Hoot 2 as an action you do in fun.  Tsk tsk Mama Hoot.  Daddy Hoot and I are working diligently with both of the boys to nip this hitting in the bud.  

Share any tips or advice you may have!

How is Mommy Challenge going?!  Well I hope.  Last week our goal was to increase the hugging.  How did you do?  I made a point to share love through touch and hugging more with both of the boys.  Hoot 1 has started to need two hugs and kisses before I leave him at camp.  Even though I hug and kiss him before I leave the building, he comes running up to me as I walk out of the door for another round.  At first I was thinking, what in the world!  But then it hit me, I've been increasing hugs and kisses.  He's been so receptive.  Hoot 1 speaks Daddy Hoot and I's love languages very well and never hesitates to give give give.  Week 12 was absolutely fabulous!

Live a Fabuless Live Archive

Week 13 is up and it mommies!  De-stress the Mornings!  How perfect was this for last weeks post?  I mean really.  Hoot 1 is going into Kindergarten this year and I need to whip our morning routines into shape.  So I will be hitting the ground like an elephant stampede with this weeks challenge.  So, de-stress your morning routine.  

A few suggested tips: 1) A good nights rest.  Make sure your little one is getting age appropriate amounts of sleep.  2) Plan ahead.  Get school clothes, lunches, papers signed, and back packs packed the night before.  3) Fix breakfast in advance.  Prepare waffles, french toast, breakfast burritos, etc and freeze them.  4) Set you alarm clock ten minutes early.  Then actually training yourself to get up the first time your hear it.  By starting off your morning in gear it sets the tone for the rest of your day.  5) Put everything you need to walk out of the house with by the door.  Back packs, laptop bags, purses, shoes, coats, and everything else.  

All of these things should try to get us on a more streamline morning and make the hiccups (lost shoes, help with tying ties, holey socks, and forgotten permission letter) a little less detrimental to the schedule.  Good luck this mommies (I know I'll need it)! Lol. 

Admittedly, I am very behind on videos.  I am working on a better camera.  I thought it would be better to wait until I got a better camera than to upload videos that I'm not happy with.  HOWEVER, I will be getting videos up over the weekend - I won't make you wait any longer.  So look out for the videos here.

Love, peace, & sanity!

-Mama Hoot

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About Mindful Mommy Monday Blogger

Dominique is an owner of Jane Doe, LLC, a mother of two, wife, and student.  She is an experienced  Artist Manager, Event Planner, and Branding Consultant.  She pushes awareness and mindfulness to the forefront of her work.  Her community work is done with mommies and assisting people re-entering the work force.  

To contact Dominique email her at: dominiquepap@gmail.com

IG: @dPaPiYON | FB: Dominique Papillion-Herr | Twitter: @dPaPiYON

www.dPaPiYON.com

Mindful Mommy Monday | On the Move with Multiples

Happy Double Dose Monday! :-) 

I realize that I missed a week or two and figured .. there's enough going on in the Hoot home to double up.  Lol.  So, generally I'm sharing information and resources.  BUT, this week I need some help parents!  Lol.  Seeing as how this is my first time with two kids - things get a little hectic when it gets time to go outside of the house and do something.  I mean really, we have to start getting ready for stuff at least 2 hours early to TRY to even be on time. Lol. 

Mom of 6 Blog

So this week we tackle being On the Move with Multiples!  
  

First I'll go through our routine.  Lol.  Let's say we all (Hoot Family of 4) have to be some where by 4 PM and we were invited around 10 AM.  

10:30 AM-11:00 AM - I start straightening up the house (I hate going out and coming back and the house is complete wreck). 
12:00 PM-2:00 PM - Showers start happening.  Usually me first (while Daddy Hoot get's the kids prepared).  Then Daddy Hoot and I finish with the kids - getting them dressed and all of their things packed.
2:00 PM-2:30 PM  - We're actually trying to leave the house.  But between "I forgot" "Oh I didn't grab" "My socks feel funny" "Did he poop" and "Where is my other shoe" ... It's 3 PM before we leave.  
3:30 - Daddy Hoot & I are finally loaded in the car with 2 little Hoots and looking at each other like "WTH?!" .. Lol. Let's not even factor in if the care needs gas or we have to stop and pick something up!

It's a complete theater production getting our family out of the door.  Lol.  I'm the producer, Daddy Hoot is the stage manager, and the Hoot boys are each battling for lead role.  Calgon take me away!  Lol.  I've tried almost everything to whip our "Out of the door" routine into shape.  But nothing.  When I prepare the night before, I think we trick ourselves into believing that we have more time than we really do to get dressed and out the next day.  Smh.  It's really intense.  But we only have 2 kids, and I know there are mommies out there with 3 and more children.  How do you do it?!  How do you successfully get everyone ready, loaded up, and out ON TIME!?  Share your On the Move routine here in the comment or in my FB community.  I'm so curious and I'm totally open to advice, insight, and suggestions.

RESOURCE:
I have one totally awesome resource for this post!! 
The Mom of 6 Blog.  Dear goodness, please READ!!

I'm TOTALLY open right now... let's help each other mommy's!

The Mommy Challenge!!  What moments did you get a chance to teach in?  Do you think they actually listened and retained?  Were you not even able to get into the lesson?  Lol.  Be honest.  It's hard to remember the challenge when you're in the mommy mode and just trying to make sure your toddler doesn't stick anything up his nose or your kindergartener doesn't pull their pants down in the store.  Although, when I think about it I can recall a teaching moment with Hoot 1 and I (totally unintentional).  He and Granny Hoot aren't always the best of friends.  Lol.  So one day when he was feeling like Granny was "picking on him" I had to have a chat about how to avoid senseless arguments and show respect to adults.  Hopefully the lesson stuck with him.  Lol.  We will see. 

WEEK 12 THOUGH!!  HUGS AND KISSES!!!  I still have little babies, so this is so fun for me.  Hoot 1 and 2 are very affectionate.  Love touch, kisses, hugs, and cuddle times .. they adore them.  I do them as often as possible.  But, I know this will change within a few years.  Hugs will become less and less.  Maybe hugs have gone down to running out the door and bed time?  Maybe you have teenagers and they grunt when you try to hug them.  HUG THEM ANYWAY!!  Let's shoot for 3 (out of routine) hugs a day this week.  Hug them when you see them, when you send them to their room for saying something nasty, when it's dinner time, when they walk past going to the computer ... hug them!  Let your teenagers and pre-teens know they have no choice and resistance is futile!  This week we're hugging their lights out.

I will be getting videos up on the Mindful Mama Hoot YouTube channel.  Please comment, share, and subscribe.  Join in the discussion in the FB community and catch me on IG & Twitter @dPaPiYON.  I look forward to all of your feedback, goodness knows we can use it.  Lol.

Love, peace, & sanity to all of you!

-Mama Hoot

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About Mindful Mommy Monday Blogger

Dominique is an owner of Jane Doe, LLC, a mother of two, wife, and student.  She is an experienced  Artist Manager, Event Planner, and Branding Consultant.  She pushes awareness and mindfulness to the forefront of her work.  Her community work is done with mommies and assisting people re-entering the work force.  

To contact Dominique email her at: dominiquepap@gmail.com

IG: @dPaPiYON | FB: Dominique Papillion-Herr | Twitter: @dPaPiYON

www.dPaPiYON.com

Mindful Mommy Monday | Postpartum Depression

Happy Monday Mindful Parents!

Usually, posts are light-hearted, fun, and informational.  As I went back and forth over the past week with what to write about, it hit me .. I have quite a few people around me pregnant .. and ALL 1st time mommies.  While sharing the joyful woes of parenting a 5yr old is fun & helpful - some new mommy topics are VERY important to talk about. 

This week we talk about Postpartum Depression.

No, I am not depressed right now BUT I did suffer from postpartum depression after Hoot 1 was born.  I was the only one in my immediate circle with a baby, so no one fully understood what I was feeling or experiencing.  I spent a lot of the bonding period with my new baby crying, feeling lonely, sick & in pain, depressed, and very unsure of myself as a new mommy.  There was family around me but I felt totally alone & misunderstood.  I went back to work ENTIRELY too early (Hoot 1 was 3 weeks).  He stopped breastfeeding regularly and everything else just spiraled.  I used to watch the Johnson & Johnson commercials of the mommy and baby all hugged up and playing and just cry my eyes out.  I didn't have that feeling with my new baby.  I was running day by day.  As long as he was alive and I was alive - I just moved through each day.  Sometimes, I still have sadness from not sharing those close bonding times with him.  I didn't regain "control" until he was about 3 months old (when Daddy Hoot and I officially got together).  Had I been able to fully express what I was going through and be understood, crucial closeness with baby could have been restored.  I did not have anyone to talk to me about postpartum depression.  I honestly didn't even know that's what I was suffering from until after I started to surface from it.  I just thought I was sad, tired, and sick.  But you have someone in your corner .. ME! 

New mommies - postpartum depression is not a sign of weakness, something being "wrong" with you, or failure.  It is sometimes just a part of pregnancy & birth; there is no reason to feel ashamed!  Your body goes through a whirlwind of physical and emotional change when you give birth.  In addition to being "disconnected" from this little creature you've been totting around for 9 months, your body releases an insane amount of hormones all at once.  Remember how crazy you felt around months 2 through 7?  Multiply that times 1,000!  All of those hormones leave your body in a rush and after birth they still have to cycle out.  Only now, there's not a little creature to help you process them.  And let's not forget the emotional change.  You feel less than whole, walking around rubbing your belly, waiting for a kick, seeing your feet (lol).  THEN add on sleep deprivation, feeling completely confused, the crying little person needing you to know what she's crying about, breastfeeding on demand every few hours, your spouse looking like O_O, and the list goes on and on and on.  

How do you know if what you're feeling is depression? Postpartum depression can start to rear it's ugly head around week 2 or 3 but not begin to reach detrimental levels until a few weeks after that (depending on the mommy).  So if you're little bundle of joy is 3 months old and you feel like your head is capsizing .. speak up!  I found an amazing list of symptoms and helpful solutions here.  One of the most effective ways to help clear these feelings .. TALK!!  To friends, family, your mate, your doctor, ME .. whomever.  Just talk.  Tell someone how you're feeling.  Do not suffer through this alone.  If you're already in an emotionally trying situation (problems in marriage, with family, no support system, etc) or have a family history of depression, then you are more susceptible to postpartum depression.  Other ways to help, have fun, laugh, do mommy and me activities with baby - taking walks, yoga, exercise .. anything.  Don't neglect yourself and don't be too hard on yourself.  Even with all the resources and information you're doing this by experience and we all have to find our own way with our own kids. Be kind to yourself!


I know we have a good time with stories and crazy things going on with the Hoot Family.  But I am truly a resource to everyone out there.  If you feel like you can gain something from talking to me, email me, IG me, Twitter, FB .. I'm reachable!  I will share every ounce of information I have and listen with every attentive bone if it will help someone in their time of need.  For mommies that may be suffering from postpartum depression right now - you are not alone and you are understood! Please bring your feelings up to your doctor.  The health of you AND the baby is his/her priority. 

Postpartum depression affects daddies too!  Daddy, talk to Mommy if you are feeling overwhelmed, unneeded, lonely, etc!  Your emotions, thoughts, and health are relevant too.

Resources:
Postpartum Depression 
Postpartum Depression and Anxiety
Postpartum Depression Health Center

Whew, now that we've talked about that.  My current reading is The Mindful Child by Susan Kaiser Greenland.  It's a slow read parents.  Lol.  I have been looking at the direct difference between parenting books written by men and women.  Maybe I'll do a real comparison once I've reached 10 of each.  So far it seems that men are more result driven.  Their books seem to be about a problem and a solution.  The books written by women seem to be based more on strengthening connection and the whole child.  Not just how to help them make better behavioral decision, be more responsible, etc.  I also just checked out "Stress Free Parenting" so that's next.  Lol.  I love reading these books and doing their reviews.  If you have a request or want more details that what's in the video reviews, shoot me an email.  

 

So how was week 10 for everyone?!  Hoot 1 is a super reader so we just up'd our library hoard! Lol. He joined the local library summer reading program and has already read his first 8 books.  I also started kicking up and reading with him during quiet time here at home.  Admittedly, sometimes I fall asleep while reading during quiet time .. but I have two kids. Lol. What do you want from me?!  Lol.  Also , Hoot 2 got books from the library.  He enjoyed them a lot.  Lots of color, textures, and interactive books.  One even had a mirror.  We included some baby proof signing books (which Hoot 1 used to become our sing language dictionary. Lol).  It's been great!! 

So, this is now week 11 (I will be doubling up on posts so we will run two weeks worth of challenges this week).  This week are Using the Teachable Moments!  So, as we already KNOW .. learning does not just happen at school.  It happens through every moment.  When they're at the store with you, work on the price of an item with a coupon.  Work on primary and secondary colors when cleaning.  Teach, Even when they "mis"behave.  Use that time to show them about kindness, mannersaas, respect, and responsibility.  Share what you taught this week.  Comment on my FB page, tag me on IG @dPaPiYON #TeachingMoment.   
 
I  will try to have this video up this evening, if not, it will be tomorrow.  I'm also videoing my 42 Days of Gratitude experience with Humbly Peax & Love.  It's definitely been amazing.  Catch the videos here!

Thank you so much for allowing me to share another week.  I truly hope everyone gained something from this post. <3 

Love, peace, & sanity to all of you!

-Mama Hoot

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About Mindful Mommy Monday Blogger

Dominique is an owner of Jane Doe, LLC, a mother of two, wife, and student.  She is an experienced  Artist Manager, Event Planner, and Branding Consultant.  She pushes awareness and mindfulness to the forefront of her work.  Her community work is done with mommies and assisting people re-entering the work force.  

To contact Dominique email her at: dominiquepap@gmail.com

IG: @dPaPiYON | FB: Dominique Papillion-Herr | Twitter: @dPaPiYON

www.dPaPiYON.com

Mindful Mommy Monday | Oh Granny!

Hidy-Ho parents!  I have hopes that everyone is well and healthy this week. <3

Question! Have any of you had any grand-parent woes?  Like you live with in-laws, or long visits from "mom" or anything like that?  I don't think I mentioned but Granny Hoot (my grandmother) moved in with us about 3 months ago.  Note: *whispering so far so good to all of the worried relatives. lol.*  But the whole experience brought questions to my mind. 

So this weeks post .. Oh Granny! or Oh! Granny! Lol. 

Depending on your experience

Granny Hoot moved up here at the beginning of April to help with the kiddies and kinda get a change of scenery.  We were very excited and totally appreciative we could offer that to her.  And we are happy she's here.  There's this real huge stereo type that the grands cater to, give EVERYTHING to, and totally "spoil" the kids.  Which to a large extent it's true.  However, on the opposite end I think it their earthly given right to kick back & doddle over the newest generation of THEM, their parents and so on.  May my body be given grace enough to be experiencing this life at 70, you better back up if I wanna give the baby some candy.  Lol.  Now that I've gotten a HOORAH from the grand-parents, there is a point of too much.  There is a place when you are damaging the bond between parent and child, you're blatantly interfering in their parenting choices, and are no longer helping the child.  

Resource: How to Deal with Pushy Parents (YOURS)! "Grand-parents are not obligated to help.  So be thankful for their assistance."

Imagine a beautiful thin, soft, amazing, piece of satin danced between parents & grandparents and you're two years old - wouldn't you want to dance in it?! .. Lol.  I imagine the mind of a 2 yr old working that way when parents and grandparents are around.  I am admittedly a grandma's girl!  Yes, I screamed "I wanna live with Granny!" "I'm going with Granny!" .. so on and so on.  There just wasn't any getting me away. Now, there was nothing wrong at home.  My mom gave us everything we wanted and needed.  I was a happy child with a regular ol' happy childhood.  BUT, when it came my Granny .. O_O .. Lol. I was a brat.  So fast forward to now and I have my own little Me's and Granny Hoot .. and everyone is alive! <3  Of course, there are differences in how she was raised, how she raised her kids, and how we've (Daddy Hoot & I) chosen to raise ours.  That paired with simple personality differences also flare up from time to time.  As they do with any other "ship" you're in with someone.  As far as family tidbits (the towels go here, we put that there, this goes down, we don't ... etc etc) I've found myself saying "Oh! Granny, we..."  Which is where I got the title.  Lol.  I'm sure she's thinking "This child is nuts."

Granny Hoot and Mama Hoot <3

The other day Granny Hoot and I shared views on children and responsibility.  I told Hoot 1 he was responsible for his body.  He's a daredevil and Taz Manian devil in the house.  It seems like he's bumping into or knocking over something 85% of the day.  And generally he's doing something dangerous - like sliding on the stairs in socks, being a "cheetah" in the living room, attempting a head stand near something glass, and the list goes on and on.  Skip to him screaming from a stubbed toe or whining because he bumped his "unfunny" bone.  Lol.  I let him know, "You are responsible for this little body.  If you're running around the house, doing dangerous things, and not paying attention to what's around you - I can't help you.  You know how to to walk, no running inside is a house rule, you run anyway.  If you get hurt you're responsible for that."  She didn't agree.  She didn't totally undermine me, she didn't snatch up Elijah and "save" him, or do anything disrespectful (but she did make mention).  Even in times of difference we still make it work.  Because between those differences is love and good intent.  I've let myself relax a lot since she first got here - being aware that a change has occurred - and being mindful of how I let it affect me.  Daddy Hoot and I also have talks often to make sure we're both comfortable and on the same page with everything.

When dealing with grandparents and in-laws it's best to be assertive in your boundaries but understanding and loving.  Let's remember they've done this a time or two.  And while things have changed - lots of things are the same.  Keep in mind there are some things that we (the new parents) can hush up about and leave alone (Granny Hoot & Nana Hoot (my mother) - let Hoot 1 eat all kinds of crazy foods) but on some things it's OK to not budge (ex. holding the little Hoots accountable and sticking with consequences).  What things you chose will change depending on your families needs.  Make sure you and your spouse/co-parent (Thanks Jade) have open lines of communication and function as a team.  The goals you have for your children and parenting style should be clear.  You should serve as an ally and place of comfort for each other - this will help if tension is tight between either of you and the grandparents.  Make sure the children know that your rules are your rules and no matter what grandparents say your mind won't be changed.  A note to the grandparents - each generation should be taking the best parts of you and adding some of them.  We may not take EVERY offer of advice, we may disagree with some methods, and you may not like some of ours .. at the end of the day you raised your children - it's our turn to raise ours.  With love we say, let us make our "mistakes" (with health & well-being of the kid in mind), take different paths, and raise the next generation.

Resources:
How to Deal with Grandparents
Why Grandparents Should Not Interfere

I hope this weeks post was able to open some lines of communication.  Remember, you are not alone (of course I'm swaying and singing).  Shoot me an email, comment on the blog, find me on IG, Twitter, etc (dPaPiYON), and/or subscribe on YouTube (Vlog posts there)!

Live a FABULESS LIfe

Week 10 of the Mommy Challenge!  Note: I found archives of the weeks. So I'm excited.  I won't have to hunt down for another blog that did it.  How did week 9 go!?  What excuses did you notice you were making for your child .. or making your child come up with for themselves?  I think we did OK.  I still caught myself saying "WHY" at times.  But I didn't allow it to become the focus of whatever Hoot 1 had done.  Daddy Hoot and I talked about the excuse thing and we are continuing to work on that!!  So, week 10.  Raise READERS!  Hoot 1 reads A LOT and Hoot 2 loves to look at pictures inside of books.  Reading is not a problem in our house.  It's looked at as fun!  We take trips to the library, read all together, read stories at bedtime, and during our quiet times I pick up a book of my own.  By reading to your children and showing them that you love to read - you make them love to read!  Let's make a pledge, at least 10-20 minutes of reading with/to your kid(s) each day this week (7 days)!  This can be a bed time story, in the middle of the day, to lay them down for nap, so on and so on.  Let them sit with the book - see the pictures - point and try to read it!! <3

See Boundaries with Kids  by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend book review here. 

Happy parenting!

<3, peace, & sanity!

-Mama Hoot

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About Mindful Mommy Monday Blogger

Dominique is an owner of Jane Doe, LLC, a mother of two, wife, and student.  She is an experienced  Artist Manager, Event Planner, and Branding Consultant.  She pushes awareness and mindfulness to the forefront of her work.  Her community work is done with mommies and assisting people re-entering the work force.  

To contact Dominique email her at: dominiquepap@gmail.com